October 18th, 2002


Why Aquaman Will Never Hit It With Wonder Woman

What I hate about sushi is that it’s expensive. Take, for instance, last night: $130 for raw, neatly cut sea life. I love sushi as much as the next person, but sometimes I wonder how uncooked fish got so damn pricey.

Especially when you consider that Aquaman gets to eat it for free. Aquaman, the weakest of all the Superfriends…

AQUAMAN: How ‘bout I score you some free sashimi, and you let me sample some of that Wonder Tuna later on? *wink* *wink*

WONDER WOMAN: How ‘bout I pull this invisible jet over and beat your fish-talking ass?

AQUAMAN: I’m sorry, please don’t tell Superman.

After dinner, we watched a bunch of stuff I recorded on TiVo. “Friends,” “Scrubs,” and a Jackie Chan movie called “Operation Condor 2: Armour of God.” Mother of God that was one awful movie.

As horrible as the worst American films are, at least they attempt to make sense. At their worst, Hong Kong flicks seem as if they’re written and directed by household pets. (And not just the cats and dogs. I'm including dumb ones too, like hamsters and turtles) “Armour of God” was so bad that I just fast-forwarded to the action scenes like it was a porn movie. Even the action sequences were sub-par by Jackie Chan standards.

Fittingly, it ends with Jackie in a bizarre showdown against what appears to be the Pointer Sisters….

BTW, thanks to everybody on Livejournal and AsianAvenue for the Angkor Wat/Thailand suggestions. For Thailand, I think we’re hitting Bangkok, because it’s the capitol; Krabi, because it’s got the best beaches in Asia; and Chiang Mai, because of its proximity to the heroin trade. If you’ve got suggestions for any of those spots, your wisdom on the matter would be highly appreciated.