T asked me to write captions for his wedding slideshow, and I obliged. As a result I got to see some old photos from the ancient times, before George Washington invented the digital camera. Take this pic, where T's head resembles a small wildlife sanctuary. T had some epic bed head back then. I bet him that he wouldn't show up to our friend's Thanksgiving dinner with his hair like that. And he won a turkey leg.
--The apartment T and I used to live in epitomized the word "shit hole." I think you could've easily found better living room furniture in alleyways next to trash cans. But hey, we had a wet bar. Maybe that's why everybody designated our pad as the official hangout. In this photo, we were playing drinking Charades, girls vs guys; and the guys were huddled together trying to think of a word for the girls to figure out. As you can see from Rog's clue, the word was "shit hole." Back then, my virgin body couldn't handle alcohol and my eyes would turn red when I drank, hence the sunglasses. My friend in the back also had the same problem, so I lent him another pair.
--This photo didn't make it into T's slideshow - which is a shame, as I thought I was doing a pretty good Goatse impression. It was right before a New Year's party in San Fran. As I was putting on my suit, I crouched down to pick up my tie while my unzipped pants were sagging past my dumb ass. Riiip! As my only other suit was down in LA, I ended up wearing *gasp* khakis.